You Are More Than Your Family History

“Diabetes runs in my family, so it’s only a matter of time before I get it.” 

“All the men in my family die in their early 70s, so I know that’s when I’ll die, too.” (That one is an actual quote from my dad, who happens to be turning 70 this year.)

You are not the sum of other people’s experiences, and you are certainly made of more than just your genetics. 

I’ll give a personal experience as an example. 

MANY people in my family have suffered from mental illness, depression, and anxiety. 

I’ve lost two brothers to suicide (one suffered from schizophrenia, the other depression). 

I’ve lost an uncle and a cousin the same way. Another uncle has made attempts, and of my 30+ cousins, most have been, or currently are, on medications for depression and/or anxiety. Even my sister has been on depression meds for years. 

If you’re standing on the outside looking in, you might make the assumption that genetics MUST play a significant role. And I’m sure to some extent they do. 

We were raised in different households, and many of us grew up scattered all over the country, living very separate lives.

I’d had my share of dark days in my teens and 20s, but for some reason I have always been able to pull myself out. 

Why? Why me? 

Maybe stubbornness. “Oh, I’m supposed to be a certain way? Eff that!”

Maybe perseverance. In spite of being victimized in various ways, I’ve always refused to BE a victim. 

But maybe it’s largely because I’ve always been a seeker. Always looking for ways to be better, feel better, know better. 

I refuse to believe that MY ENTIRE LIFE is predetermined by my family history. 

So I started researching ways to be happier. Researching what the leading causes of depression and anxiety are. Researching what I can do every single day to keep the inner beasts quiet.

And then I started practicing what I learned. Every. Single. Day. 

Physical movement. Proper nutrition. Getting outside in nature. Practicing gratitude. Surrounding myself with real connections/friends. Being vulnerable. Seeking therapy. 

And giving myself grace. A lot of it. It’s okay if I’m sad sometimes. It’s okay if I cry. 

But there’s a timer on those things for me. I can’t stay there. I need to process and start moving along. 

Sometimes taking those big feelings out for a nature hike helps significantly. Or playing with my dogs. Or deep breathing. 

My point is, knowing something “runs in the family” doesn’t mean you have to throw your hands up and succumb to your “fate”. 

If it’s diabetes, then do everything you possibly can to fight it. Change your diet. Exercise. 

If it’s heart disease, then research every way you can cultivate good heart health. 

Whatever it is, you’re not guaranteed to get it. Of course there’s still a chance you might. But WHAT IF there’s a possibility you won’t? 

It’s a risky game to chalk the fate of your health up to “Well, it’s bound to happen…” 

You are not your mother, cousin, brother, grandfather. Take control of your own life.